NAME: Gordon Abbott
ALIAS: Drop dead gorgeous sex stud or Fat git. Take your pick.
AGE: A young 43.
SEX: On birthdays and special occasions, oh and when wife wants something expensive.
OCCUPATION: Financial consultant about to be ex Financial Consultant..
FAVOURITE FOOD: Junk food and plenty of it.
FAVOURITE COLOURS: Blue and red, like Marc record labels and Crystal Palace shirts.
FAVOURITE TV SHOW: Hate TV.
FAVOURITE RODENT: The rat who smashed my wing mirror.
PREJUDICES: I Hate Snobbery my dear boy, now passed the confounded cucumber sandwichs.
MOST HATED PET: My wife's six cats, tempted to say my wife.
POLITICAL AFFILIATION: Abstain.
FAVOURITE SURGICAL APPLIANCE: Colonic irrigation looks a jolly wheeze.
FAVOURITE BOOKS: One's with dirty pictures in.
FIRST BREAK IN SHOW BUSINESS: I'll tell you when it happens.
FAVOURITE STIMULANT: Mind your own goddamned business.
THINK OF A NUMBER: 1870483.
DOUBLE IT: 18704831870483.
CRIMINAL CONVICTIONS: None yet, but i've just been made redundant so i may have to kill my boss.
AVERAGE INCOME: You taking the mick. See above.
FAVOURITE DISEASE: Dysentry, it kept me going for a fortnight.
TURN YOUR HEAD: Females who....careful, nearly my first criminal conviction there.
FAVOURITE MUSICIANS: Marc and Andrew Ridgely and Margarita margatan if that's how you spell it.
SIZE OF SHOES: Huge. You know what they say about the size of a man's feet.
WHO DO YOU LOVE? : Linda Lusardi and Goldie Horn.
IS SOMETHING HAPPENING?: I've got a feeling in my water.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS?: Cystitus.
THE PERSON YOU MOST LIKE TO FORGET BUT CAN'T: Mother-in-Law.
DO YOU DRIVE?: Yes, i just couldn't resort to cliches here.
DO YOU DRINK? Is a pigs arse pork.
FAVOURITE RECORD: Tanx.....and The Slider.....and Electric Warrior.
FAVOURITE MOVIE: The Exorcist, thanks for reminding me of my Mother-in-Law.
HOW DOES IT FEEL?: Gooooooood.
YEAH, HOW DOES IT FEEL? Leave me alone i'm concentrating.
AMBITION: For my children to be happy.
WORST FEAR: Cancer. Lost my poor Mum to this. God Bless Her.
FAVOURITE CITY: London.
LEAST FAVOURITE CITIES: Leeds, they really make you welcome as a visiting football fan.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE IF YOU WEREN'T WHAT YOU ARE: Different.
FAVOURITE COMIC BOOK: Fiesta.
DO YOU OWN YOURSELF?: I'll just ask my wife.
Hope you find this of some interest. Some of the answers are a bit tongue in cheek, for instance i didn't really have to ask my wife. Only my Mother-in-Law. Rock On.